So, tomorrow is my birthday. Instead of my usual gorging on fatty foods and falling asleep after half a beer, I’ve decided to mentally create my own party—what I would consider to be the “perfect” birthday. After all, you only turn 29, like, six or seven times, right!?
I will wake up in the morning to breakfast in bed presented to me by the entire staff at Scholastic. “Wake up, sleepy head,” they’ll say. “You need energy to sign all those book contracts!”
When I walk into the kitchen, Carolyn Mackler will be trimming fresh flowers from the garden and saying, “Oh-ma-god, Robin, you look so totally good for 29!”
As I head off to work, a limo will pull up and Richard Peck will be driving. He’ll tell me a story about how my office is such a long way from Chicago, and he’ll talk to me the whole way there in such a soothing and genius way, that it reminds me that I need to read all of his books again. Then call my grandma.
When I sit down at my cubicle, I’ll turn to see Lois Sachar sitting next to me with a copy of “Sideways Stories from Wayside School.” He’ll read me the little chapters out loud and I’ll giggle while I work.
On my way home, I’ll stop for gas and the station attendant will be Gordon Korman. “Need you’re oil checked?” he’ll say. I don’t know why he’ll say that. He just will.
Then when I finally get home, my husband will run out to meet me and say, “Honey, guess who is joining us for your sixth annual 29th birthday dinner!?”
“Even better…Jay and Eve.”
Aaaaaaaahhhh…the perfect ending to a perfect birthday.