Thursday, June 19, 2008

A Smell of My Own Medicine -- Jay

There’s nothing about writing in this post. I just want you to know why I’m so proud of my wife.

But first, a li’l backstory…

In college, my roommate worked at Barnes & Noble and didn’t get off till midnight. I would meet him and a few other friends at Denny’s, where we’d eat seasoned fries and drink coffee for a couple hours before heading home. It was within those cushy booths that I perfected the fine art of comedic timing. My goal, whenever a new person joined us, was to get his or her coffee to come squirting through at least one nostril.

Sometimes I was able to do it alone. But quite often, it required my roommate to do a little tag-team with me. Since we had identical senses of humor, we would immediately understand when the other person was delicately setting up a joke. For example, say the new person on the other side of the booth was beginning to lift the coffee mug to his or her lips. My roommate would say something which sounded innocent enough. And then, just as the victim’s throat opened up to swallow, I would turn the "innocent" subject around…and the coffee would see fresh air once again.

My wife never understood the humor in that.

But just the other day, we were sitting in my car getting ready to go into a theater to see Kung Fu Panda. I was quickly downing my coffee because hot liquids were not allowed inside…and lukewarm, apparently, counts as hot. Unbeknownst to me, my wife began laying the groundwork for a messy pay-off, and I was paying close attention to everything she said. And just as my throat began to open, she seized the opportunity.

But it didn’t work. I was able to keep the coffee in my mouth.

So I kept trying to swallow before she came up with a back-up plan, but the giggles kept the liquid from going down. So my wife leaned close to my face, and with a voice which sounded like the spawn of Janis Joplin and Satan, she shouted, “Do it!!!

And for the first half of Kung Fu Panda, all I smelled was coffee.

I’m proud of you, babe.

I taught you well!

- Jay

BONUS COOLNESS: Check out this NPR All Things Considered report. (Thank you so much, Amber!)


Anonymous said...

Laugh - Laugh - Laugh - Great story in the life of Jay.

WOW on the NPR article

Movie coming soon ! ! !


Gregory K. said...

I'm so...uh...proud of you both! I will start working up how to create a spit-take or nostril-take at the upcoming summer conference....

Disco Mermaids said...

That's really gross, dude.

But also very, VERY helpful.

(Thanks, JoanMarie! That's almost TOO easy!!!)


Em said...

Hi Jay,
Thought you might like to see this comment that was left on my blog about your book. And congrats on the NPR piece! :)


"I'm not really good at picking out books, I'm not even that good at answering people when they ask "what type of books do you read?" This book just kind of caught my eye when I was walking around a store and I thought it sounded good.

I at first wasn't to interested in reading it because I was in the middle of another book, but I finally picked it up and couldn't put it down. I finished this book in three and a half days, reading in class, at break and lunch at school, even my boyfriend got irritated with me because I was reading so much. I just couldn't help it. As a teenager I can relate to this book, understanding the points Jay is making through Hannah's story.

Although, this could be a great book for adults too. Helping to understand what kids lives could lead to. It does seem kind of a long shot to say that high school could make a kid kill themselves, but I absolutely believe it, mostly because I have seen multiple of my friends come close to it.

Please never underestimate what high school can do to your kid.

No matter who you are, you should read this book.
I love it, I'm sure anyone would."

Wild About Words said...


Congrats on your All Things Considered piece. Your career is skyrocketing. I remember all the years of hard work that got you there.

Enjoy the ride!

And congrats to your wife for that whole coffee thing.

Best regards,

krw3b said...

My husband made tea come out of my nose the other day. I thought I had him beat--I stopped laughing and swallowed hard. But the swallow went up, not down.

So in the end, I was just sitting there calmly as tea streamed out of my right nostril.

I said, "I seem to be leaking."