The other day I went into our hangout coffee shop, Linnaea’s, to meet with Jay and talk writing. As you may have noticed, Linnaea’s is like our own version of the bar in St. Elmo’s Fire (only with less beer and no one named Demi Moore or Rob Lowe…which is a shame, really).
Jay had been working furiously on his rewrites and his eyeballs were dashing back and forth, so I figured he needed a break. “Hey, I know! Let’s talk about MY book!” I said.
“Okay. What’s happening next in your story?” he asked with focused eyeballs. (So sweet!)
“Well, it’s going to get more exciting, and more, you know…well, it will have a climax and stuff, and then she’ll learn something, and then it will wrap up nicely and everyone will be happy.”
“Seriously, Robin. What’s going to happen next?”
I flopped my head on the small square table. “I don’t know! You caught me! Are you happy!?”
I went on and said some other things and Jay said it’s really not nice to call people names.
Once we got past the awkward silence, we were able to come up with some really great ways to finish my book. It was amazing. We talked and brainstormed literally for hours (I know because I got a parking ticket). What we came up with was nothing short of miraculous and now I know exactly what will happen next and exactly how it’s all going to wrap up! What a gift!
If there had been a fly on the wall during our conversation at Linnaea’s (or if Demi Moore had been on the wall, which would make this story a lot more exciting) here are some snippets of what that fly, or beautiful woman, would have heard:
- No, too cliché.
- Make sure she solves her own problem.
- Yeah, it’s funny but that’s something you would do.
- Again, too cliché.
- Would you stop eating my peanut butter cookie?
- Take out the part about the helicopter and the cliff rescue and the Channel 12 News crew, plus all the cliché parts, and you’re on to something!
- Wow! You took a long time in the bathroom. Is everything okay?
- No, overusing references to great literary works will not win you awards. Or readers.
- Seriously, you should put some money in the meter.
- Of course you can kill your main character. (Kidding. Right, Jay? You were kidding, right?)
- Is that Demi Moore on the wall?
Just then, Eve walked in and we told her how I never put money in the meter and how my car is probably being towed as we speak and how we spent the last few hours coming up with wonderful ideas for my book.
The girl didn’t miss a beat. “Great! My turn!”